Wednesday, September 26, 2007

New York Times Does It Again

Every once in a while they'll come out with an article that just strikes a chord with me. One that makes me wish I was a subscriber, until I remember the mountains of unread paper that come with being one and not being able to keep up, of course. This particular article was not only particularly apt, but also very timely for me.

As a girl that's had a "real job" since I was barely 21 I've always struggled with this. My boyfriend is a PhD student, so his current income is definitely a lot less than mine, but he could potentially make a lot more than me in the future, which sort of balances it out. But what if he doesn't? Or I end up with someone else that never will? Is that something that I would be ok with? As my income keeps inching towards 6 figures, I have to keep asking myself these questions. The higher my income gets, the smaller my pool of eligible men, if I'm only willing to consider those that make more than me. It seems silly. And yet, as much as I tell myself that it doesn't matter, it keeps turning out that it does in many small ways. If my high-earner boyfriend pays for me, I feel grateful and treated. But when I know the treat is coming out of a student's stipend, I feel guilty. Sometimes when I look at the price tag of a gift I want to give him, I change my mind because I know he couldn't afford to spend as much on me.

Is it weird that when I was offered the opportunity to apply for a large promotion at work on Monday I hesitated for a split second because I thought the associated raise might price me out of the dating pool? (It was only a second people... I'm interviewing for it on Friday.) I guess at least this article, while it offers no solutions, has convinced me that I'm not alone.

1 comment:

SavingDiva said...

A lot of other bloggers have written about the exact same article (I saw a link to it on Before this article exploded into the blogging world, I never thought about it! I don't plan on having kids, getting married, or stopping work before retirement. I probably will get married...and maybe have kids...but I'm not going to plan for it. I guess it wouldn't matter to me if my boyfriend/husband made quite a bit less than me. My current bf is also a student, so a cashier at Kroger makes more than he does...and it totally doesn't matter. It's also good for keeps me from splurging on expensive dinner and lavish gifts...because I know it will make him feel uneasy.

Good luck with your interview!